plant Parents grains
To be the father you want to be, it is important to look within yourself and discover the ghosts that may haunt you, so you can become more aware of models that you run the risk of repeating their children .
Dr. Susan Forward, a therapist well known who has written many books on the subject of relations related the following questionnaire designed to help people know if they have been reared by parents or not toxic. Some of these questions can make you feel anxious or uncomfortable, it is normal, it might be very difficult to say to oneself, the truth and know the extent to which our parents can hurt us .
Even if it makes you feel bad, an emotional reaction is perfectly healthy. To make this simpler, these questions relate to both parents, even if their answers can be applied to a single parent.
Your answers to these questions can give you some ideas about their own
His relations with his parents when you were a child
- His parents told him "you were bad or worthless? "They insulted him? Are you constantly criticizing?
- His parents "used physical force to discipline? Have you ever been beaten with a belt, broom or other objects?
- His parents "were actually depressed or not available due to emotional difficulties or because of physical or mental illness?
- You "had to take care of their parents because of their problems? His
- parents did you have anything that you had to keep secret? Have you been sexually harassed in any way?
- Are you afraid of their parents most of the time?
- Are you afraid to express their anger at their parents?
Now that you are an adult
- Do you find yourself in destructive or abusive relationships?
- Do you think that if someone is very close, will hurt and / or leave him?
- Do you expect the worst in people? How life in general?
- Are you afraid that if People learn to know them really do not want?
- Do you feel anxious when you know the success and at the same time is afraid that someone will find that you are a fraud?
- Do you feel angry or sad for no apparent reason?
- Are you a perfectionist?
- Is it hard for you to relax and take pleasure?
- Despite their good intentions, do you find yourself acting like their parents?
His relationship with his parents as an adult
- Are your parents still treat you as if you were a child?
- Many of the important decisions of your life, do depend on whether they approve or not their parents?
- Does intense emotional or physical reactions when you spend time or expect to spend time with your parents?
- Are you afraid to disagree with your parents?
- Do your parents handle threats or making you feel guilty?
- Do your parents handle money?
- Do you feel responsible for the way they feel their parents? If you are unhappy do you feel it is their fault? Is it their responsibility to ensure that they are better?
- Do you think that it matters little what you do, never do for their parents?
- Do you think that someday, somehow their parents will change for the better?
Toxic Parents
Overcoming his painful legacy and restoring their lives.
Dr.Susan Forward
The lasting influence of parental care
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